You don’t have to follow any of these suggestions in order to meet someone on the internet and get hypnotized by them. But it WILL increase your chances!
Upload a profile photo
First things first–and this may be the most important. Whenever possible, use a profile photo of yourself. Anything is better than nothing. Far, far better than nothing. It shows that you are a real person, not just some faceless thing on the internet. People are far more likely to trust you and like you if you are showing yourself. The internet already allows a vast amount of anonymity. It is very difficult to read someone. If you are not showing yourself, it looks really sketchy (Same goes for people who are doing the hypnotizing).
Be transparent–use an actual name or username
You may use your real name or a name that describes what you are into, like ‘SuperheroHypno’ or anything else you are into. Just don’t use a username thats a jumble of letters and numbers like “267595323” or “FjroWuA”. That looks the absolute worst.
Don’t immediately ask for a hypnosis session.
I get this message (almost) every single day. And it is the first thing they say. They ask to be hypnotized…. before we have even established who they are/interests… or even who I am/my interests. Would you walk up to someone and begin conversation like that? Yes, you are very excited to meet a hypnotist. But talk to them first.
Talk to them first
Establish a connection. Find common interests, just like you would with any other human interaction, online or offline. Here’s a few things you could talk about:
-How you/they got started with hypnosis
-Why you/they like to engage in hypnotic fun
-Your/Their interests in life
-Goals you would like to achieve
-Fun things you did today
-What kind of culture you/they live in
-What you do for a living (and other standard conversation)
Please remember, if someone is interested in hypnotizing you without first establishing any basics, they may be a predator. Openness and honesty are an important part of trust.
Allow yourself to be interesting (be yourself and don’t be shy about it)
You are an interesting person. Among the massive sprawl of billions of humans, you are totally unique. You could just say that your interest is that you want to give up control/be dominated/lose your free will. But everyone online says that. It also may be a misunderstanding of what hypnosis is (or just a roleplay). Do you REALLY want to do whatever they want you to do? You probably don’t.
Some may want you to be a blank page, but most would like a real human.
Most recreational hypnotists prefer that YOU have a preference. No one wants a clone. People want to meet other interesting, strange, new humans. Look at it this way–there is an endless amount of people on the internet looking to be hypnotized, while claiming to have no interests other than the interests of whomever they are being controlled by. You’ll want to stand out from that.
Hypnotists do not have some master plan for what they wish to do with every random person they meet on the internet. They generally like to work around specific things that you are into. If they do suddenly have a master plan for you, you should be wary. They may be a sociopath (sorry I burst a bubble there, but the many tubes of the World Wide Web are not always a safe place).
It’s okay if you really don’t have any specific interests though. Don’t worry about it. But also don’t be afraid to reveal your deepest, darkest desires.
Get some exercise and movement in your life
People like working with those who are active. That’s a fact. There is just no getting around it. Take care of your health. It makes you more attractive. It shows that you are looking for some forward movement. It helps you make conversation, as your mind functions better. It’s just a good idea in general. It’s also a really big thing if you are a man looking to be hypnotized by another man. Gay men are especially interested in men that work out.
Even if you are just at home, dress as if you are out with friends. At least dress up when you are going on cam, or going online to find people. It makes you feel good. Dress for success. Don’t underestimate it.
Sometimes guys will just show up on camera completely naked. I’m a freedom-loving kinda person, so I’m not afraid of the human body… but it does make an unusual first impression. And not everyone will take too kindly to that. At the very least, people may really like seeing you take off whatever you’re wearing.
No, you don’t have to wear a suit. But it would be nice to see you wear a shirt.
Getting out of the victim game can be hard. But it will pay of with dividends if you move on quickly from disappointments you encounter in the community. Seeing you complain will turn people away, big time.
Get some therapy if you need therapy (dont ask internet strangers)
Don’t go to recreational hypnotists looking for them to fix you. If you are having psychological issues, you can see a professional, whether it is a therapist, psychologist, doctor, naturopath, or medical doctor. You could even see a hypnotherapist and enjoy some great hypnosis, just like you’re looking for!
Asking a recreational hypnotist to help you in a time of stress is fine, but you can walk a thin line between healthy and unhealthy behavior if you become dependent on this, much like an addictive drug or a co-dependent relationship.
Consider paying money for it (you may find people to do it for free though)
Just like seeing a great hypnotherapist, meeting up with a top-notch hypnotist may cost you money. Paying for this is NOT financial domination (that’s a whole different dynamic). it is a service in exchange for money, just like you get with any other service. Hypnosis is a highly sought after skill. The demand is high and the supply is low. Imagine asking a street artist to draw you a picture for free. Just remember that some people offering free services are looking for a trade of sorts….
It’s much easier to find men to do it for you
Well…. it’s always easier to find men on the internet. If you are female looking for a male, you will not find it too hard. There are also lots of men who want to hypnotize men.
Be aware of what online hypnotists may want you to do
Talk about limits and expectations beforehand. Everyone is different (I love that!) but there’s a few things that recreational hypnotists often enjoy making you do. After all, they are providing a fantastic, out-of-this-world experience (hopefully). That means you are often wanted to do something for them. This may include going on camera. Most find it a lot more fun if they can see and hear you. That’s understandable.
Most recreational hypnosis interactions online are sexually based (surprised?), but they certainly do not have to be.
Some people may want you to take your clothes off, and/or masturbate. They may want you to dress a certain way, engage in certain habits, or act out in funny ways. You may find yourself doing strange facial impressions, being messed with psychologically, or engaging in a fetish. They may want to take photos or videos of you. They may wish to publish this on the internet. In extreme cases, they may even want you to come travel to them in person. Keep these things in mind. These things will sound frightening to some, and absolutely tantalizing to others. Again, remember to discuss it beforehand, and make sure you trust them.
Trust means having each others best interests in mind.
None of those things are bad things. What matters is consent.
The law tends to agree with the notion of consent, too. Hypnotizing you to do something is not against the law, unless you are being forced or threatened (ie. coercion). However, it is illegal for someone to upload images of you onto the internet without your explicit permission. This is because of copyright laws. If someone uploads images without your permission, they have committed copyright infringement and you may file a DMCA Takedown (or whatever similar process your country uses).
Speaking of which, having photos and videos of you on the internet can be very helpful, though….
Option: Make photo/video content
Getting the eyeballs on you is the name of the game when it comes to internet success. You can take photos of yourself being hypnotized. Or pretending to be hypnotized, no one really cares. You can upload hypnotic content, like sharing other people’s work. You could make videos of yourself being hypnotized by someone, or even being hypnotized by a video.
People tend to flock to content creators, so people will message you first and you don’t have to worry about finding them.
Option: Talk to someone who uploads content of people being hypnotized
This is a good way to get your image out there. If they share you online to the hypno community, the hypno community will find you. Of course, you don’t have to do this. You may be too shy. You may not want your photos on strange places of the web. And that’s totally normal. It just gives you an advantage if you don’t mind. You can find these people on picture sharing communities like Tumblr, BDSMLR, or any other place.
Just like you have an interest in being hypnotized on the internet,
Option: Try hypnotizing someone else
Everyone loves being mesmerized! Okay, I’ll admit… not everyone. But trying both sides will give you insights into what it’s like to be on the other end. Trying out hypnosis will make you a better subject and being a subject will make you a better hypnotist. There are many folks who would love to give you a shot!
Option: Set up a scheduling program
You can use a CRM or other similar online application like Hubspot, for example, to set up a method for people to schedule a time to meet. You set the times you are available and people can book you.
Watch out for predators
It can be very tempting to let yourself be hypnotized and controlled by a narcissistic, borderline, or psychopathic personality. It may even be your fantasy (as is common for recreational hypnosis subjects). The allure of ‘controlling’ people may be tantalizing for them, and so communities like this are often full of these people. It is YOUR responsibility to protect yourself. You do not have to do anything that you are not comfortable with. You will find that these unsavory people actually have very little control, in reality.
Here’s a few signs to look out for:
-Someone who wants you to jump into a play session immediately
-A wall of text, copy and pasted in an attempt to mesmerize you (I often wonder if this actually works)
-Tossing hypnotic triggers at you, looking for one you may already have.
-Attempts to make you visit them in person (Which is okay as long as you have already established trust and friendship)
-Forceful attempts at collecting your money without offering a service or product (unless financial domination is discussed as an interest beforehand)
-Attempts of exclusive control (telling you that they are the only ones who can ever hypnotize you), Though many people specifically request this kind of thing.
-Attempts to interfere with your personal relationships (ie. telling you to leave your family, friends, a partner, or even your job)
Even if someone says that they will not do certain things, it does not mean that they will keep their word. Humans have a tendency to lie. Especially the abusive or sociopathic type, and they do love a good vulnerable, submissive type the most. If you’re reading this so far, it’s very likely that you are that type. Remember, most of these attempts will actually be unsuccessful. It is very hard to make someone do something that they do not want to do.
Here’s the hard part–none of these things are wrong. They just need to be approved of by YOU beforehand. Consent, consent consent.
Of course, the vast majority of people are just just normal folks out there looking for some fun!
Accept that your online relation will probably end
People flake. They disappear. This is the way it is on the internet. People get bored. Their life changes. They may find someone else to play with, find a new job, or a life partner. You will probably have no idea what happened. It’s best to accept that recreational internet relations are like this. That makes it all the more important to enjoy it while it’s happening! Let loose completely.
If you want a 100% reliable connection, then you have to see a professional.
Go to conventions
Real life interactions are much better than online. They are much more real. find your way to a convention whenever possible.
Here’s a few conventions you can try:
NEEHU (New England Erotic Hypnosis (un)Conference)
MEEHU (AKA Entranced Con)
Note for webmasters: If you want people to link to your site, make sure it is secured and encrypted.
Try different websites and keep looking
This is the only thing that you actually have to do. Everything else listed here is just a suggestion. Just a boost. A power-up. Of course, the only thing that will get you in contact with other people is seeking them out.
Here’s a few websites that are hubs for recreational hypnosis you could try
Chat groups for individual content creators, like video/audio makers. (especially the kind of content you really like). You’ll have to search around the internet for this. Find the content creator’s Youtube/Soundcloud/Website and see if they have a group chat.
Forums (which are beginning to die out in favor of chat rooms)
How to find a kinky female partner (post from Milovana user Alison)
I get asked a lot of questions. I get asked if about cunnilingus and yeast infections. I get asked about the safety of using orange parking cones as insertable sex objects. I get at least one question a week asking for plausible excuses for men to have size 14 Stillettos (or other similar fashion item) in their closet. But the question I get ask most frequently is a variation of this: how do I find a kinky partner?
So you want a romantic/sexual partner who shares your fetishes and explorations? Here are thoughts on getting that in your real life:
1.Kinky partners aren’t something you can order from a catalog. People value being an individual. See a potential partner as more than the sum of their kinks. Just like you wouldn’t want to be judged by the weight of your wallet, don’t judge someone solely on their willingness to do what you want.
2.If you want a partner- you have to be a partner. To share in her kinks and fantasies. Now let’s get clear: this doesn’t necessarily mean her fantasy to wear stockings and have cunnilingus all day. Her fantasies might not even be sexual.
3.Most human beings enter romantic relationships (and stay in these relationships) because of shared needs, goals and desires. Share something already. Communicate.
4.Now that you are ready to communicate- get out there. If you are alone, and you don’t want to be, than get your ass out there.
5.Check out the local Munch scene. If you aren’t certain what’s available, do a google search of “Your State” and “BDSM” and “Munch.”
6.Go online. Some of the better places to look: www.collarme.com | www.fetlife.com. There are a number of fetish specific sites for things like AB, ANR, Shoes/Feet, etc. Get on them. ALT and Bondage are expensive for the better features- but they aren’t bad per se. Also go on boards like Literotica- there are a LOT of kinky people there.
7.Participate. If you are going online, have a positive profile that really shares who you are. You can save the kinks for later if it makes you uncomfortable, but gently hint that you have some prurient interests to explore.
8.No whining on your profile! Be upbeat and positive.
9.No kink of Facebook or Myspace. These online places are great- but they are directed towards teenagers and family. Be appropriate.
10.Don’t grovel. You may want to be submissive- but before you can be on your knees, you have to stand on your feet.
11.Find your worth. In the dating process, you have to know why you have value. Believe in yourself.
12.In opening communications with any potential partner only hint at the kinks. It’s okay to tell someone you like that you have some fun fetishes and fantasies that you can’t wait to share with them. It’s not okay to tell someone that you haven’t connected to yet how much you want them to own your cock or fuck your ass or … Patience young Jedi.
13.Face before penis. That’s the picture rule. Send a nice face pic first… and then later send a cock shot. Ask first about the cock shot.
14.Don’t be creepy or hypersexual until she is ready for it, especially if you haven’t met in person first. It’s great you have a feminine side, but she may not be ready for the fact that you love to pay young women to hand you their panties so you can put them on, and that you have a collection of 200 pairs you have collected this way. It’s wonderful you love long hair- but don’t ask for a lock of hers to masturbate with. If you have to ask whether an action is okay- it probably isn’t.
15.Be nice. No insults. No trolling. Even if the partner of your dreams never replies, please don’t reply back with how much of a stuck-up bitch she is. It’s not just that this isn’t the slightest bit productive, but it also puts you in the wrong place. When you think all women come from the “Land of Stuck-Up Bitches”, happily ever after is a long, long way away.
16.If you are communicating by email or text: grammar and punctuation are sexy. Grown women like men who are grown-ups.
17.Don’t lie, particularly about anything where the lie will be obvious when she sees you. Twenty pounds and a couple inches of height can be delicately fudged. Sending a picture from your twenties after your fortieth birthday isn’t right. Not only is it a lie- but it’s a lie that doesn’t get you what you want. There are many women (myself included) who think older is better.
18.If you are submissive– give your submission as a gift, not something she gets as a matter of course. Your submission to her is something of value, treat it that way.
19.Unless you are poly, do not mention past partners in the first ten communications with a new one. Just don’t. No “I just went through a difficult break-up” or any other kind of whining about your ex. State your status: single/divorced/widower and leave it at that. If you aren’t able to do that, spend some time getting over your -ex before you find someone else.
20.Young woman usually don’t want much older partners unless they are successful. Fact of life. If you are 40+ seeking 18-25 arm candy, be prepared to be an ATM with legs. There is nothing wrong with this: you want her for something she has, she wants you for something you have.
21.NO STALKING. No cyber stalking. It’s one thing to google someone to figure out what they have done. It’s another to know all of their movements all the time.
22.Wait until you meet before commitment. No matter how great that 4 hour phone conversation is- until you have had one in public- make no promises.
23.Don’t give up. So you didn’t find someone the first day, keep at it.
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